Meeting Announcements

⇒ April 2010

THE PROPHET’S LAST SUPPER

April 14, 2010

***HERE IS YOUR FINAL OPPORTUNITY TO LEARN THE SECRET OF HOW TO RAPIDLY SEDUCE SLUTS IN AN INTIMATE & INTERACTIVE SETTING WITH THE WORLD’S MOST NOTORIOUS SEDUCTION GURU***

If you have not already heard, Hollywood producer Brad Goodman is putting the finishing touches on an upcoming documentary about the life and work of Dimitri the Lover. He speaks about the film here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8iwVgnPEpgw

Mr. Goodman’s film credits are extremely extensive, and include work on Borat, Bruno, and Religulous:

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0329021/

The test version of the Dimitri The Lover movie trailer elicited what Mr. Goodman considered in his professional opinion to be the optimal mix of praise and ire, guaranteeing both ticket buyers and protestors, and convincing him that the film concept is viable for theatrical release:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=neW-_HJ4Vjc

Unfortunately, it is too late for us to submit the film to the Hot Docs Film Festival in Toronto for April 29, 2010. However, the film has been submitted for consideration to the Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF) for September 2010. Everyone on our mailing list will be informed if the film is selected for screening.

In the meantime, Mr. Goodman and the rest of the production team have asked Dimitri The Lover to cease holding TORONTO REAL MEN meetings. They felt that the paltry $29 on-line price for seats purchased in advance was under-selling his TRUE VALUE. The Prophet never meant for these monthly meetings to make any money, but rather offered them as a community service to horny men throughout the Greater Toronto Area. The other factors that convinced Mr. Goodman to ask him to cease holding TORONTO REAL MEN meetings in order to increase the value of Dimitri The Lover’s douchey brand include …

• Over the next few months the production company will be entering into critical negotiations with various distributors regarding worldwide sale of the completed film.
• Plans are being drawn up for an ANTI-METROSEXUAL WORLD TOUR during which Dimitri The Lover will lecture in front of adoring fans at larger venues.
• There have been several offers for a reality television show based on either the TORONTO REAL MEN or The Church of Dimitri of Latter Day Sluts.
• Requests to make Dimitri The Lover available for interviews are rolling in and Mr. Goodman prefers that The Prophet concentrate on disseminating his seduction wisdom in media forums with a vast public reach, rather than in intimate settings, in that the former better assists in promoting the film.
• Now that Dimitri The Lover is becoming world famous, holding regularly scheduled meetings always at the same venue creates both privacy and security concerns, from the likes of The Paparazzi and FemiNazi Militants respectfully. Our organization has not yet developed sufficient protocols or infrastructure to deal with these threats, and must do so before making him available for future scheduled public appearances.

Details regarding each of the above points will be sent to everyone on our mailing list as they unfold, provided doing so does not jeopardize any ongoing negotiations or business opportunities.

Therefore, as hard as this decision was for The Prophet, he has chosen to acquiesce to Mr. Goodman’s demands and make this particular TORONTO REAL MEN meeting the LAST ONE EVER! April 14, 2010, will be a day that will go down in HIStory as The End of The Age of Pisces, and THE DAWNING OF THE AGE OF DIMITRI !!!

Instead of a customary topic for this meeting, it will be a completely open “Ask Dimitri the Lover ANYTHING” style of forum. Since merely being in the presence of The Prophet is often enough to turn the girliest of men into a REAL MAN, the theme of our next TORONTO REAL MEN meeting will be “TOUCH OF THE PROPHET’S ROBES AND YE SHALL BE SEXUALLY HEALED!” It will feature Dimitri The Lover fielding any and all questions for 3 solid hours, and allowing non-participants to quietly bask in the glory of his POWERFUL SEXUAL AURA for therapeutic purposes!